A New Beginning by Beth Wiseman

Author:Beth Wiseman
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Zondervan
Published: 2018-06-07T00:00:00+00:00

CHAPTER 9

Noah sat next to Rebecca on the porch swing in front of her house. Gavin had helped him plan what he was going to say, but now that he was here, he wasn’t sure his explanation was going to be enough to get him back into Rebecca’s good graces. He took a deep breath.

“I’m sorry for breaking up with you. I’m sorry I said I didn’t want to be baptized. It’s just . . .” He paused, trying to recall all the times he’d practiced for this conversation. “I got cold feet.” Squeezing his eyes closed, he cringed. Nowhere in the planning had the term cold feet been considered. “Well, not really cold feet, more like cool feet.” He shook his head. “Nee, that’s not what I mean either.”

Rebecca twisted to face him, her hands folded in her lap, careful not to so much as brush his knees with hers as she repositioned herself. “Let me help you.” Glowering, she raised her chin. “I think what you’re trying to say is that you found an Englisch woman more attractive than me, and you were completely taken in by her, enough so that it caused you to question whether or not you wanted to be baptized and marry me.”

She’d practically quoted what he’d told Paul, but it was inaccurate. He just wasn’t sure how to explain to Rebecca in a way that she’d understand and still want to be with him. “Ya, I was attracted to her, but not just the way you think.” He cast his eyes down. “I was able to tell her things I can’t tell you.”

“Like what?” Rebecca’s tone was clipped, and Noah knew he had a long way to go to win back her affections.

“I’ve always wanted you to love everything about me. I didn’t think you needed to know my every thought, my every fear, or all the things I question about our life.” She raised an eyebrow but also tipped her head to the side a little, seemingly prepared for him to go on. “To be able to talk to someone so openly about my fears and the things that worried me felt freeing.”

“Freeing?” Rebecca gritted her teeth. “It felt freeing to be able to talk to a stranger about your innermost feelings?”

“Ya, it did.” He held up a palm when she opened her mouth to say something. “Just let me finish. When—”

“Did you drink alcohol at that party?” Rebecca clenched her lips together, which Noah had always thought was cute. Right now it was plain scary. Lying wasn’t going to win him any points. Rebecca would see right through him, and God would frown on it.

“Ya, I did, but not much. And if it makes you feel any better, I was sick as a hound dog the next morning.”

She smiled a little, which was the only encouragement he’d received since he arrived, even if it was a little coldhearted.

“My point is we ended up stuck in a room together because neither one

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